Spending time in silence is the best way to relieve stress and take stock of what is happening in your life. There is no prescribed amount of time but start off with two to three minutes of absolute silence and then gradually add on.

Listen to your body and your intuition. In silence your insights are inspired. This is your time. Your time of comfort, your time of peace, your time with yourself. Nothing for you to do, just be in silence. You will be rewarded with an overwhelming sense of peace and tranquility.

A state of meditation is what happens during your quiet time. As you prolong the quiet time you enter into a true communion with your higher being and with God. Meditation is the time for listening. It is the purest form of prayer because it is your time to listen and just be.

There are many meditation techniques and there are three that I use regularly: The first is the “lexio divina, ” taught to me by Sr. Bernadette Eugine, r.a. of the Assumption. One meditates on the word of God. The easiest way to do this is to get the reading of the day. Then underline or encircle words or phrases that strike you. Do this without thinking; they can strike you for no apparent reason. Then in your silence, meditate on what the words are trying to tell you. You will get your message or guidance and even affirmation.

The second is a Chakra clearing meditation from Doreen Virtue, a well known author of books on Angels. Chakras are your energy centers. I practice a guided meditation in the morning and in the evening on occasion using this CD.

The third is technique is called Raja Yoga meditation. Classes for this open-eyed meditation are being offered at the Brahma Kumaris Center in Makati. There are other meditation techniques. Some use breath awareness, others music and most meditate in absolute silence. There is no right or wrong way. The important thing to remember is that this is your time with God. Take a class or two to find what technique works for you.

2. Food is not for comfort and you don’t have to medicate for every little thing.

Food is for nutrition; it can even heal but comfort foods such as cake and ice cream or binging on pizza and pasta will not make you happier. Food can affect your moods. What you put into your body is essentially determining how your body will function.

Most people take a pill for the smallest discomfort. Know your body and your body will communicate with you. Pains and discomfort are signs that you need to pay attention to certain aspects of your well being. A chronic sore throat may indicate that you may be restraining yourself from speaking your truth or expressing yourself. A chronic headache may mean you are overstressed or you are over analyzing something.

So before you raid the fridge and go for the medicine cabinet, make sure that you first determine the cause of your pains. Then solve it or confront your issues. And then again sometimes it means letting go and surrendering those issues to God so that you can move on. Only you will be able to determine the right course of action and you will find this in your times of silence and in meditative prayer.

3. You are what you think, do and say.

Watch what you think, do and say. The law of attraction is one of the most powerful laws of the universe. You become what you think, do and say. This is why some people are luckier than others. If you are the type of person who is constantly finding yourself in the longest line or with the most inept salesperson in the store, chances are you are sending out negative energy. If you think, do and speak in a positive light, you will in fact attract the positive. It is a law of the universe, you can’t change it, so use it.

If you think all people are flawed, guess what, you will only encounter flawed people. If you keep thinking you will might get sick, chances are you will find yourself in front of a doctor very soon. The list goes on.

Practice gratitude; it’s so much easier to be grateful than to put down something. If you are stuck in traffic, use it as an opportunity to return missed calls on your cell phone (using earphones of course) or to simply appreciate the music on your iPod. Don’t allow yourself to get angry. Find a solution and be grateful for it.

4. You are responsible for your own happiness .

Peace and happiness are your natural state of being, but they get affected by our daily lives and interactions. I’ve learned the hard way that you can never control the way other people think and behave. But you can most definitely control your reactions, and who you want to become based on the certain situations that you confront.

Happiness comes from within; it cannot be determined by someone else. Phrases like “If only I can get my ex back, then I’ll be happy” will certainly prove wrong. However if you can tell your partner in all sincerity, “I’m okay being with myself yet I choose to be with you,” chances of a much healthier and more loving relationship will follow.

When making decisions, ask yourself one or two questions: Is this who I am? If the answer is no, then you have your decision. If your answer is yes, ask the second question: “Is this who I want to become?” You will be surprised as to what this reveals to you.

Make the decision to be happy and the rest will come to you.

5. Forgiveness, surrendering and letting go are the most difficult, but most important aspects of attaining peace.

This is probably the hardest lesson you will ever have to learn in life. Forgiveness is the greatest miracle in the world because it comes from a state of pure love. To forgive yourself and others is one of the most liberating experiences you will ever have. Getting there is humbling, enlightening and one of the most gratifying aspects of your spiritual journey. And none of this is possible without prayer.

The tighter you hold on to something the more it weights you down. This is true for most aspects of your life but you will find it most applicable in your relationships. Whether romantic, familial or friendly, most relationship issues do need to be surrendered because once you have detached yourself from the issue, it is only then that you can see it as it is, without judgment and preconceived notions.

6. Read and be inspired.

In this day and age there are so many books and learning materials you can find to aid you in your journey. Pay attention to books that seem to jump at you or books that you are attracted to in the self-help or inspirational section of the bookstore. Those are the books that will aid you depending on your current situation. God also reaches out to you in various ways, through friends’ advice, music lyrics, or the theme of a movie you are watching so pay attention to the signs and messages. You can’t learn everything overnight. Surrender your learning to God and know that when the student is ready the teacher will come. Watch as one by one your mentors will come into your life. You will have different mentors for different aspects you need to learn. You will find that teachers in forms of books, healers, articles even the Internet will be presented to you as you go along. Take classes. Many classes are offered on meditation, healthy cooking, dealing with anger, etc.

Be aware of the opportunities and lessons that come your way. Be happy, stay happy and keep yourself centered at all times. Blessings and light will come your way.

Lia Bernardo is the editor of Cocoon Magazine, due for release this month, which will focus on Home and Wellness. She also conducts Wellness Workshops and Stress Management Workshops.

6 Lessons Learned on the Road to Wellnes is a post from: Visualize Future | Law to Success | MindMovies and Self-Hypnosis

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Make The Change Happen

How are you going to do it, my friend? You're all done feeling wretched all the time, you know forgive does not mean forget, you are soooo ready, but you need a plan. Read on, my friend, and find out how to get the benefits of forgiveness for yourself. Right now.

Guilt and Hatred Are Killers

Ask any doctor. Stress is a killer. This is because your body and mind are a continuum. In other words, although they are not entirely the same, a great overlap exists that unites them. Relieve your mental stress and your body will be happier too. Nothing relieves mental stress like forgiveness. Guilt and hatred resolve nothing; they just sustain the negativity that continues to obstruct you from your goals. Forgiveness, on the other hand, undoes the stickiness that binds you to an unhappy past.

Does It Work?

Absolutely – for you. Since the forgiveness experience will happen only for you, only you will receive its benefits. Your forgiveness may not influence a change in the behavior of others one bit. But it's not about them. It's about you. Forgiveness is about generating your own healing. You are the only player in your life over whom you have all the power. It's time to exercise your personal power, your right to choose to feel better about who you are, your right to process your past and move on with your life.

It's a Private Thing

Since forgiving is all about you getting your own heart clear, it's best done in the privacy of your own mind. Afterwards you'll have the choice of telling others, if you like, but initially the process works best in solitude. Tell no one, just do the work. And watch how easy it is to feel better all day every day. Contrast this to the fact that all the pity parties in the world with your friends and relatives never made you feel better one bit. Those tactics don't work because they don't process emotions, they merely create a feedback loop that deepens the groove of the pain. Since you know that what you used to do didn't work, it's time to do what does.

Forgive in Steps

Like a pyramid, forgiveness may seem overwhelming at first, but it's easily accomplished step by step. So begin by recognizing that there are three sections:

.forgiveness of others
.self-forgiveness
.receiving forgiveness from others

And these can be further broken down into nicely manageable chunks.

Forgiveness of Others

When you forgive others in categories, it proceeds more easily. For example, you could choose to use the categories of Strangers, Friends, Family, The People who Hurt You The Most, and Anybody Else. You may include additional categories like Exlovers, Neighbors, Coworkers, Employees, etc., and some forgivers need to add the category of Humanity Itself. And you can start with the categories you find easiest. Once you notice how good it feels to forgive, this will inspire you to forgive everyone as much as possible, as fully as you can.

Self Forgiveness

In this step, start with your earliest years and ascend: Newborn, three year old, five year old, ten year old, teenager, 20s, etc., and on up to your current age, forgiving yourself thoroughly for absolutely everything as you go. Once you get to your current age, forgive yourself for your whole life. Remember, all humans are flawed. No one is a perfect son or daughter, man or woman, husband or wife, student or teacher, worker or boss. You are allowed to make mistakes and learn from them. Forgiveness is an optimal method to process your learning.

Receiving Forgiveness from Others

In the privacy of your own mind, visualize then apologize to folks you've wronged, and let them accept your apology. It may surprise you to learn that others really want to forgive you. They do. So let them forgive you and receive the cleansing of that forgiveness. Afterwards, with some people, you may elect to actually apologize to them in person, but proceed carefully. There are a few folks in the world who can not accept apologies in real life, and this is why you process all of your apologies in your mind's eye thoroughly first, so that you get the emotional benefit of having apologized whether those apologies get accepted in real life or not.

Forgive by Percentages in Repeated Attempts

Can you forgive the people who hurt you the most 10%? 20%? 80%? 99.9%? It's not all or nothing. Ease on up to higher and higher percentages, always aiming for 100% forgiveness, but being real with yourself. If the people who hurt you the most are not 100% forgiveable on your first attempt, continue forgiving them bit by bit till you get as close to full forgiveness as possible. Start with a realistic percentage, then increase your forgiveness on subsequent attempts, always aiming for 100%. Just do your best.

Forgiving People Versus Events

It can be one thing to forgive individual people, and can yet be quite another thing to forgive the things those people did. What to do? Forgive the events and actions as they come to mind. As you think of instance after instance, forgive everyone involved as best you can for everything that happened.

by Michelle Beaudry

How To Forgive is a post from: Visualize Future | Law to Success | MindMovies and Self-Hypnosis

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